Sacramento Real Estate Views

Mortgage Guidelines Are Getting Tougher!

This Is MUST KNOW INFO!

This morning while I was working away, a fellow Realtor, Cera Hinkey sent me some new mortgage guidelines that will affect virtually EVERYONE attempting to get a mortgage in today’s tough, tough, tough mortgage environment.

<—– = Mortgage underwriters!

Brace yourself.  This is UGLY!

NEW UNDERWRITING UPDATES

1. All borrowers’ birth certificates will be required with pictures taken in the hospital with medical staff. Birth certificate with a live home delivery will not be eligible for first time home buyers.

2. Marriage certificate with bridal dress will be required if both husband and wife are required to qualify for the loan.

3. GFE (aka good faith estimates) will require blood sampling from a recognized institution within three days of application.  Signature is optional!

4. DNA test will be performed at closing to avoid any non-arms length transactions. Loan funding will be contingent upon satisfactory receipt of DNA results.

5. Copy of Pay stubs and W2 will only be acceptable ONLY through IRS and ONLY with a wax-sealed envelope mailed directly to the lender.

6. Seven witnesses from the neighborhood will be required as proof of primary residence.  Their birth certificates will be required in triplicate.

7. All appraisers will be required to use masks and ear plugs at the time of inspection to avoid any personal influence by the borrower or broker for the appraised value. Phony mustache and glasses are optional.

8. In order to correctly calculate DTI (aka debt to income) and true housing ratio a list of grocery items, monthly usage and brand names will be required with receipts and projected 12 month consumption chart.

9. Closing will not occur without loan officer presence at settlement and the loan officer’s picture will be taken at the closing in a mug shot format with loan number. Picture should meet standard guideline of 2 X 2 inch in color format with one facing and one side view.

10. Loan officer picture will be attached to the Deed and loan documents and will be made available for general public and security agencies in case borrower defaults on the loan.

While this is meant to be funny, believe me, this is what it feels like to get a mortgage done these days!

Thanks for visiting!

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Tags: sacramento home loans

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 10th, 2010 at 12:47 pm and is filed under Mortgage Information. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

1. Rachel said at March 10th, 2010 at 4:14 pm

   That was funny! Thanks for the afternoon smile!

2. robsaxe said at March 10th, 2010 at 7:26 pm

   My pleasure…real estate humor can be so dry! LOL

3. Ryan Lundquist said at March 12th, 2010 at 12:17 pm

   Funny. At first I thought, oh no, is there news I have not yet heard…

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